“Solitude is fine but you need someone to tell that solitude is fine.” ~ Honoré de Balzac

In my June 22, 2015 Ageless Beat blog, “Alone Doesn’t Mean Lonely….” I spoke about how we all may experience loneliness and, though it may seem ironic, sometimes it’s beneficial to spend time alone doing something nurturing to ease that sense.

In addition to finding comfort on your own, another way to overcome loneliness is by spending time with each other. There are many ways to find community and connection, whether you prefer the company of one other or many others. Below are some of the ways I have learned (and helped coaching clients) to diminish any suffering that can accompany the feeling of loneliness.

~ Make time and be fully present to nurture current relationships you feel are worth keeping, and consider letting go of those which are draining or negating. It’s easy to know which are which, just check in with your very real body messengers and trust your gut. Rather than e-mailing/texting, experiment with having more interactions over the phone (or Skype or Facetime with those at a distance) or, better yet, meet in person.

If it wasn’t for today’s technology I’d have no real relationship with my new grandkids living in Arizona. It’s the same even with my two elementary school grandkids here in the east. When they are involved with sports and birthday parties or I am engaged in business and travel, which prevent our biweekly visits, Facetime saves the day.

~ Consider volunteering. Whether you like working with animals or are seeking human interaction, volunteering for an organization (or giving in another way, like cooking a meal for someone in need) can be a great way of being with others while also doing something philanthropic.

~ Become active with an organization or group to meet others while engaging in fulfilling activities, such as: classes in exercise, art, quilting or crocheting, music, history, geography, technology, business, etc.; book groups; environmental, religious, political organizations or a professional group of your peers. MeetUp.com is one online way to find groups. Local newspapers and magazines often list events that may interest you.

~ If you are online, you can check out websites like Boomerly.com, which offer a means to connection for like-minded friends and travel companions, as well as potential romantic partners. Don’t forget your LinkedIn groups and expanding your connections on Facebook and others.

~ Check out retreats with your favorite guru or authors. Join a women’s group or a yoga center.

~ Make an appointment to speak with a ICF certified coach, licensed therapist or clergy.

~ How often do you interact with different generations? This can be a great way to inspire new connections and insights. Create an intergenerational group in your local community center or offer mentoring within your company or professional organization. Go to concerts where younger people abound.

~ Participate in online conversations like this one – offer your comments and suggestions below and let’s make this journey on The Ageless Way even better!!

The world is full of others who are seeking others… The more all of us explore, the better chance we all have of finding each other and reducing loneliness and becoming happier AND healthier.

 How would you describe what loneliness feel like? What techniques do you use to cope with, or overcome your loneliness?

(Image Credit: circle of friends by maveric2003, flickr.com)

“Ah! There is nothing like staying at home for real comfort.” ~ Jane Austen

Is it any wonder that as we grow older so many of us want to remain in our own homes? After all, our home is often the space where we have lived for years, if not decades, a place that reflects who we are and the aspects of life we find most comfortable and fulfilling. Our home can be the place of some of our best memories. It can afford us whatever independence we want to retain and a sense of stability amidst a sea of changes, losses, and/or uncertainties that can accompany aging. Our home is often in a location where we have established roots and cherished connections. Because the landscape of our own home is already familiar, we may have a greater sense of safety there, both emotionally and physically. Additionally, with assisted living facilities and other communities coming at a cost, it may also be a wise financial decision to stay where we are.

A study, “Aging in Place in America,” commissioned by Clarity and The EAR Foundation, and posted on MarketingCharts.com, asserts that nearly 90 percent of those who are Boomers and older want to age in place without having to move from their homes. More than half (53%) are concerned about their ability to do so.

In addition to some of the better known modifications one can make to a home (grab bars in bathrooms, handrails on stairs, bright lighting, accessible light switches, cabinets, doors, no entry lips, etc.), the study showed that many people are also opening to using new technologies which offer promise for being better able to Age in Place. Technologies can assure greater independence and include items such as: sensors in homes to monitor health (e.g.: breathing and pulse rate); computers, smart phones, and programs like Skype and FaceTime which enable online connection with loved ones and essential care providers; and, tablets offering large print magazines, newspapers, and books. There continue to be advancements in medical alert systems and gadgets, as well as apps and programs which enable the tracking of the resident(s), their medications, and their appointments. Some technological devices can also alert caregivers in the event of an emergency situation.

The issue of such technologies was even the topic of the Senate Special Committee on Aging’s hearing last week. Although it was clear technology may offer peace of mind, as well as cost savings to programs like Medicaid, the panel cautioned about needing to also be mindful about ensuring individual privacy and safety, as well.

Additionally, Aging in Place and the accompanying technological tools may not be the right or best decision for everyone. Luckily, there are many options for those who either do not want, or are unable, to stay in their own home. Assisted living facilities are not the only option, either. There are an increasing number of possibilities to accommodate lifestyle preferences, which also enable a sense of community. These can include: active adult communities for those over 55; co-housing options (living in your own place and sharing a common area, such as a community garden and/or common room or building for gatherings); shared housing options (e.g.: mother-in-law apartments or living with other housemates); and, intergenerational communities in which residents may also assist each other with needs such as babysitting or ride-shares.

There are several positive impacts of longevity and the accompanying growth in housing options. These include potentially boosting the economy and providing ample opportunities for entrepreneurs of all ages to develop and provide products and services which will assist and enrich lives, regardless of where we follow our hearts to make our homes.

What type of community do you think is ideal for you and/or your loved ones? Do you have any new ideas for enhancing housing options for those over 40? Or new entrepreneurial ways of serving the Aging in Place movement?

(Image Credit: Wreath by dichohecho, Flickr.com)