In his book, All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, Robert Fulghum offers essential tidbits of wisdom most of us learned as children, including “Share everything. Dont take things that aren’t yours. Put things back where you found them.”

In the last decade or so, adults have been revisiting these essential lessons in new ways, creating businesses and opportunities for what has been dubbed “The Sharing Economy,” a business concept based on renting or borrowing goods and services, rather than owning them. Though this idea is not new — libraries are one of the oldest examples, volunteering another — the advent of technology has made sharing a variety of resources easier than ever, impacting how we live and how we choose products and services.

As described by Benita Matofska of The People Who Share“The Sharing Economy is a socio-economic ecosystem built around the sharing of human and physical resources. It includes the shared creation, production, distribution, trade and consumption of goods and services by different people and organisations.”

Advocates of sharing who engage in this practice, which is sometimes called The Collaborative Economy, do so for financial and/or social/communal reasons, as well as flexibility and/or ensuring a more sustainable world. Examples of some of the better-known companies that have emerged out of the sharing concept include: Airbnb, ZipCar, Lyft, Uber, Craigslist, TaskRabbit, Pinterest, and GiftCardSwapping, to name just a few.

A 2013/2014 report based on two surveys conducted by Vision Critical’s Voice of Market states that there are 80 million “sharers” in the U.S. Though it claims nearly half of sharers across the globe are under 35, there are still a significant percentage (between 19-40 percent) of participants, particularly in America, and particularly outside urban centers, who are 55+. Regardless of age, location or other differences (e.g.: higher incomes), however, the study asserts that “..all businesses need to know that sharers are not a niche market. Sharers are part of the mainstream set of customers that businesses can’t afford to ignore.” Additionally, those over 40 are not only consumers but also solopreneurs and entrepreneurs, many focused on the Triple Bottom Line of people, planet, and profits.

As with all new ideas, start-ups in The Sharing Economy may need tweaks to ensure best practices for the greatest number of people (including safety and liability). That said, it appears this concept is here to stay. Despite any resistance we have to changes, what has been proven time and again is human’s ability to adapt to circumstances. As we move through life’s transitions, including the changes that come with The Sharing Economy, perhaps it is wise to be mindful of even more of the words from Robert Fulghum’s aforementioned book, which are excerpted below.

~ Play fair.
~ Don’t hit people.
~ Clean up your own mess.
~ Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody.
~ Live a balanced life – learn some and drink some and draw some and paint some and sing and dance and play and work everyday some.
~ Take a nap every afternoon.
~ When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.
~ Be aware of wonder.

In what ways have you participated/are you participating in The Sharing Economy?

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In decades of work as a leading GeroFuturist aiming to transform the story around our culture’s approach to aging, I have often spoken and written about this issue. I continue to assert that a large and vital part of our new boldly vibrant story is dependent upon the language we use to define and describe growing older — to ourselves and others, and by those who serve and market to us. When we change or redefine the terminology we use in those descriptions, we change the perception, truth, and dynamics of getting older across the lifespan (for twenty-year-olds, as well as centenarians – and everyone else in between…).

It may sound simple, but it’s not easy. So how do we integrate individual and cultural mind shifts in order to change the “languaging” around adult development and growing older? Something has to give! A perfect example of misplaced, yet commonplace, labeling as we grow older is referring to Baby Boomers as “seniors.” I can assure you that those of us over 40 don’t relate to that at all. In fact, it makes us cringe and run in the opposite direction. Yet, “senior centers” across the country continue to bemoan and wonder why Boomers aren’t banging down their doors for “senior” services and community-building.

We clearly need new terminology to help shift the paradigm. We need a full expression of the affirmative, powerful, and even juicy aspects of aging. Old dismissive stereotypes do not consider the reality of those of us entering or beyond midlife as capable of being fully active physically, socially, mentally and professionally (to say nothing of the fact that the over-40 crowd is the largest adult consumer demographic and, thus, worthy of priority marketing and product development focus). Manifesting such transformation, as with all vital historic movements, will take patience, determination, effort, awareness, intention, time and acceptance.

As is the case with so much in life, there is not just one way to think about growing older or the terminology around that process (a process which will happen to all of us lucky enough to live “to a ripe old age”). My vision for the new story of our times is rooted in an approach toward aging that is “Ageless.”  At this juncture, this word may mean different things to different people.

A retired literary professional recently shared with me that when she hears the term “Ageless” she thinks of it as dismissive of aging, since it seems to infer wanting to avoid looking or growing older. I see the term in a different way, as being age-affirming. Ageless, Ageless Aging, Agelessness (and timeless) to me are all about transcending age at any age… all while owning our chronological age …whether 30, 40, 70…101. Agelessness involves not being defined nor limited by our chronological age at the same time as welcoming/embracing whatever age we are.

Agelessness is about transcending our limited, dismissive and insufficient attitudes toward aging so that we see ourselves and each other as whole and precious parts of a larger evolution with many births, rebirths, endings and new beginnings…no matter what our age or life stage. This does not mean we deny our aging. Instead, being Ageless and embracing The Ageless Way is evidence that we, at every age, own the vitality of life within us and our value, and remove the limits culturally placed on our youth and our elderly.

I feel so strongly about the importance of boldly shifting our definition of the word Ageless (as it applies to Ageless Aging) and proclaiming it as central to our new story of what it means to grow older, that I have titled my upcoming book The Ageless Way.

So, together, let’s re-cognize the abilities inherent in growing from youth to midlife to becoming an elder. Rather than seeing Agelessness as working against the fulfilling life all of us can envision for ourselves, our communities, our world, we will move forward with that word as a testament to our ability to surpass the heretofore ingrained and perceived limitations of aging. Will you join me on that journey?

What does being “Ageless” mean to you and what is your reaction when you hear that word? What are some words associated with growing/being older which no longer have any bearing on the NEW story of our age?

“Solitude is fine but you need someone to tell that solitude is fine.” ~ Honoré de Balzac

In my June 22, 2015 Ageless Beat blog, “Alone Doesn’t Mean Lonely….” I spoke about how we all may experience loneliness and, though it may seem ironic, sometimes it’s beneficial to spend time alone doing something nurturing to ease that sense.

In addition to finding comfort on your own, another way to overcome loneliness is by spending time with each other. There are many ways to find community and connection, whether you prefer the company of one other or many others. Below are some of the ways I have learned (and helped coaching clients) to diminish any suffering that can accompany the feeling of loneliness.

~ Make time and be fully present to nurture current relationships you feel are worth keeping, and consider letting go of those which are draining or negating. It’s easy to know which are which, just check in with your very real body messengers and trust your gut. Rather than e-mailing/texting, experiment with having more interactions over the phone (or Skype or Facetime with those at a distance) or, better yet, meet in person.

If it wasn’t for today’s technology I’d have no real relationship with my new grandkids living in Arizona. It’s the same even with my two elementary school grandkids here in the east. When they are involved with sports and birthday parties or I am engaged in business and travel, which prevent our biweekly visits, Facetime saves the day.

~ Consider volunteering. Whether you like working with animals or are seeking human interaction, volunteering for an organization (or giving in another way, like cooking a meal for someone in need) can be a great way of being with others while also doing something philanthropic.

~ Become active with an organization or group to meet others while engaging in fulfilling activities, such as: classes in exercise, art, quilting or crocheting, music, history, geography, technology, business, etc.; book groups; environmental, religious, political organizations or a professional group of your peers. MeetUp.com is one online way to find groups. Local newspapers and magazines often list events that may interest you.

~ If you are online, you can check out websites like Boomerly.com, which offer a means to connection for like-minded friends and travel companions, as well as potential romantic partners. Don’t forget your LinkedIn groups and expanding your connections on Facebook and others.

~ Check out retreats with your favorite guru or authors. Join a women’s group or a yoga center.

~ Make an appointment to speak with a ICF certified coach, licensed therapist or clergy.

~ How often do you interact with different generations? This can be a great way to inspire new connections and insights. Create an intergenerational group in your local community center or offer mentoring within your company or professional organization. Go to concerts where younger people abound.

~ Participate in online conversations like this one – offer your comments and suggestions below and let’s make this journey on The Ageless Way even better!!

The world is full of others who are seeking others… The more all of us explore, the better chance we all have of finding each other and reducing loneliness and becoming happier AND healthier.

 How would you describe what loneliness feel like? What techniques do you use to cope with, or overcome your loneliness?

(Image Credit: circle of friends by maveric2003, flickr.com)

Have any of you been through a recent change or loss which transformed your role in and/or perspective about life and your future?

With graduations, weddings, and kids going off to camp, college, or on a global trek — all marker events which reach a crescendo at this time of year — many of us find ourselves on the precipice of being empty-nesters or on our own for the short or longer term. There are really no words that can adequately describe the vacuum that can engulf us when we are freshly on our own…even if we relish aspects of our new freedom. Like all things in life, there’s always a downside and upside to consider and hopefully embrace.

If you’ve had any of these experiences, even those which are positive, chances are that at some level you feared and/or felt a sense of loneliness.

According to Dr. Sanjay Gupta, in his article Loneliness Can Really Hurt You, “Loneliness is an invisible epidemic that affects 60 million Americans. Everyone feels lonely at times in their lives, but chronic loneliness poses a serious health risk. New research suggests that loneliness and social isolation are as much a threat to your health as obesity. As Richard Lang, MD, chair of preventive medicine at the Cleveland Clinic, puts it, people need to attend to loneliness ‘the same way they would their diet, exercise, or how much sleep they get’.”

As with other aspects of big “S” self-care, though, it can be confusing to know where to begin in order to feel better.

There are many ways we can all diminish loneliness, regardless of age or stage of life, both alone and with others.

So…let’s get this conversation started and begin at the heart of the matter — with YOU!

Being lonely is different than being alone (have you ever felt lonely despite being in a crowd of people?). It is a feeling, not a fact of life. In fact, time spent alone can often be exactly what you need to clear your mind, boost your energy and mood, engage your creativity and reconnect with your inner passions. Instead of putting yourself down (our natural default mechanism) find a way to take pleasure in some solitude.

Have you ever appreciated doing any of the following on your own?

* gardening

* walking along a beach

* painting/drawing

* meditating

* doing yoga

* journaling

* traveling

* going out for a meal or movie

These are just a few of the many ways to enjoy your own company.

A couple of weekends ago my husband was out of town for several days. In addition to chatting with friends I’d been meaning to catch up with, I filled my time reading, writing, and, in the best of my alone time, happily binge-watching a full year of Frankie and Grace on Netflix!

Sometimes simply reinforcing the connection with yourself is the best kick-start antidote to any lingering or pervasive sense of loneliness you may experience.

Do you have any other suggestions as to how we can ease loneliness when spending time alone? Let us know in the comments below!

(Also, be sure to check out Wednesday’s Ageless Beat blog when we continue this discussion about ways to assuage loneliness through connection with others… Any tips you think we should include in that (or future) blog(s)? Let me know today by sending an email to Karen@KarenSands.com or feel free to comment below!)

(Image Credit: IMG_2886 by Sudheesh Joseph, Flickr.com)

Although I knew that as a planet we’ve been headed in this direction for decades, I never believed it would happen so quickly, and I am still having trouble wrapping my mind around the sheer size of this storm, hitting New York City of all places. An earthquake in California, a tropical storm in Florida, a tornado in Kansas—these are not unexpected locations for Gaia’s fury. But a hurricane in the heart of Manhattan is so anachronistic—it’s like something straight out of a disaster film.

Except we’re not watching the credits with the comfort of knowing it was all just make-believe, a wild fictional exaggeration.

In futuring, we refer to these unexpected high-impact occurrences as Black Swan events. They underscore the fragility of our ability to predict the future, yet they also inevitably strengthen our sense of power in shaping the future.

Black Swan events force us to act. We have no choice. The status quo in one way or another is gone, and in the aftermath, we have the choice to rebuild what was lost or to create something better.

What is heartening is that I see all the ingredients we need to bounce forward: community, resilience, and a trust in the recovery process embodied in how many people are stepping forward to help, to donate, knowing that even the smallest donation will help and will be used to rebuild.

All over, people were taking in friends, family, even strangers who no longer had power—or homes. When Rabbi Alexander Rapaport heard about the horrible food being served at the armory to evacuees from Far Rockaway and Coney Island, he put out a call on social media for volunteers. Close to 100 people answered the call, making and delivering hot meals until the food ran out, at which point another social media request brought in donations that, last I heard, were still being used to feed the stranded.

Even before the NYC marathon was canceled, Julia Burke was planning to donate her entry fee and travel costs to the Red Cross and hold a marathon of her own in Buffalo to raise awareness and funds for the recovery—on Monday morning, she brought $2,700 in cash to the Red Cross, in addition to the more than $1,500 in online donations (which are still coming in) which she and the handful of women who joined her managed to raise through their alternative marathon.

Movements like Occupy Sandy (and Occupy Sandy NJ) have emerged, grassroots efforts to fill the inevitable gaps in our stretched-to-the-limit emergency services. You can get the latest updates on exactly what people need and where on the site or by following them on social media. Or you can donate through the Occupy Sandy “Wedding Registry” on Amazon, an ingenious way to make it easy for people to donate exactly what the hurricane victims need. (“This couple has requested no gift wrap.”

I could go on and on about the many people who have stepped up and come together, demonstrating community, resilience, and faith in each other and in themselves. I’m sure you have heard many stories yourself, or even taken part in creating one. What stands out to me in these stories is the creativity and the use of our virtual connection to each other to enlarge the community involved in the relief efforts.

I believe this only confirms the path we have been on all this time—toward more collaboration, more alignment of our values with our lives, our work, our businesses, more of a focus on people and the planet, even if this focus is coming rather late in the game as far as our planet goes. Is it too late? That depends on what we do next.

As we continue to move forward, to rebuild and build anew in the areas affected by the superstorm, I hope that this spirit of collaboration, community, creativity, and resilience continues to spread and ripple out through our nation and the globe.

Black Swan events like Superstorm Sandy show us what we’re made of. But only in the months that follow do we have the opportunity to make something of ourselves and our world that embodies the best in us—and beyond.