Everyone wants long term success. But it is elusive for most.

Long term success is dependent on knowing where you are now and where you are headed. Then closing the gap. Frequently. Continuously.  Whether it’s your business, your career or your life at home., it’s easy to get off track, lose touch or get buried under. Without a true sense of where you are in the moment, it is impossible to realize your dreams or be a leader in your field.

Re-calibrate your profound knowledge

The only way we can take 100% responsibility for sustaining our success is to keep re-calibrating-in every aspect of our lives and organizations.

Key to successful recalibration is to acquire what my dear departed mentor, Dr. W. Edwards Deming, coined as Profound Knowledge. This umbrella phrase emphasizes understanding change and how to measure it, being aware of emerging trends and shifts, and learning how to apply this knowledge to leading and sustaining long term success.

Bottom line: If we don’t acquire Profound Knowledge we cannot know how to prepare for and leverage coming change, thus how to sustain our success long term.

Understanding change means understanding shifts in our personal world as well as tracking trends that capsize us, overtake us, or cause us to flounder.

Learning the Hard Way

Unfortunately one of my Gen X male clients learned this the hard way. A rising star in his field and recently married, he was planning far a great future for his kids, tons of time for fun and all the trappings of success. As if out of the blue, the rug got pulled out from under him. His “Happy Homemaker” wife fled, saying I’m out of here!

Somewhere along the way there was a breakdown or perhaps many small fissures below the surface. Had they been recalibrating an checking in with each other, communicating the truth of what was so for each of them…perhaps they could have saved their marriage…or at least ended it with love, grace, and forgiveness.

Even in the most secure relationships, unexpected change happens to ruffle our plans. A recently returned to work mother of teenage kids reported that her new career is now going gangbusters and she no longer worries about the empty-nest . But, the new ripple in her life is that her once very successful husband, in his late 40’s, now faces an unknown future. Surprised by the shifts in his industry, “suddenly” he and his business partner are facing the probability of closing their doors. What once appeared to be the sure path to their dreams, is no crumbling beneath them.

Change is inevitable. If you can learn what Profound Knowledge is and apply it you can avoid these same pitfalls and NOT LEARN THE HARD WAY!

What steps are you going to take to future cast your long term success?

Midlife crisis. It is a term bandied about, which can conjure images of sports car purchases, new gym memberships, flirtations/affairs/divorces, botox and bikinis. Midlife is, for many, a time of transition, including whether or how to retire. It can be a time of more questions than answers, a time in which you feel less steady as you review and revise who and what you find most meaningful, valuable, and worthwhile. Some changes are desired and welcome, while others feel forced or unavoidable.

I believe, as I share in my upcoming book, The Ageless Way, that  “Those of us who are entering, in the midst of or, like me, leaving our rich middle years, are well poised to use such times of transition as opportunities to tap more deeply into our reservoir of innate soulful greatness – what I refer to as our Signature Greatness DNA. As history has shown, change makers and world shakers always deepen their culture and leave a legacy for future generations by confronting the difficulties of such times with invention, insight, and transcendent understanding.”

It is at these times that many people choose, whether out of desire or necessity, to begin a second (or third, or fourth…) career, which is often referred to as an encore career. There are different reasons people choose to pursue an encore career, such as: financial security; personal fulfillment and meaning; the desire to give back to the local/national/global community; flexibility; work/life balance; learning new skills and utilizing those that have been acquired over decades; sustaining social connections; pursuing a long-held dream…

Regardless of the reason(s) for selecting an encore career, those in their middle and later years have garnered personal and professional experience and wisdom which they can offer to employers and clients. In addition, Boomers and Matures (members of “The Silent Generation”) grew up in eras which inspired active, organized involvement in response to diverse current events, such as WWII, the Korean and Vietnam Wars, and the fights for civil and women’s rights. As a result, these workers are often valued for their efficiency, sense of responsibility, loyalty, hopeful attitude and strong work ethic.

The trend toward an increasingly older and diverse workforce creates multiple opportunities for building successful intergenerational office environments. Encore career professionals offer a variety of abilities and knowledge to enhance the capabilities of the younger generations and benefit, in return, from their colleagues’ perspectives and talents with new work aspects like technology. Such mutually supportive business cultures ensure a more solid future for everyone, from those engaged in encore careers to the generations yet to come.

There is even a movement afoot to support those choosing or hiring for encore careers. Encore.org’s mission is “building a movement to tap the skills and experience of those in midlife and beyond to improve communities and the world.” It seeks to engage the vitality, wisdom and talents of those in the third and fourth stages of life while emphasizing social purpose. Seeing an aging society as a solution to, rather than creator of, problems, Encore.org connects generations in diverse ways, including hosting an annual conference and offering The Purpose Prize for people over 60 who integrate their passion and experience for the betterment of society. Created in 2005, the prize aims to “showcase the value of experience and disprove notions that innovation is the sole province of the young. It’s for those with the passion to make change and the experience to know how to do it.”

I mentioned the term encore career in a blog posted earlier this week, “Second Time Around” , in which I wrote about Barbara Beskind who is now in her third year of work as an inventor, a lifelong dream she achieved just shy of her ninth decade. Additionally, I have met/worked with diverse women and men who have chosen (are choosing) to embark on an encore career. One 51-year-old woman hot shot media executive left her job to pursue what she always wanted to do as a teenager — she went back to school to become a social worker. Another high flying 62-year-old woman left an intense demanding sales executive post to return to the beloved art career of her youth. A 63-year-old retired teacher became a published author. In her January 16, 2015 New York Times article, Older Job Seekers Find Ways to Avoid Age Bias, Kerry Hannon shares the story of a 66-year-old man who was laid off from a high-powered position. After undergoing the unease of transition, questioning his purpose and averting age discrimination encountered in interviews, he ultimately ended up teaching part-time, making money, and feeling valued. And I am one among many who have found fulfillment in an encore career by creating their own business.

Encore.org and the AARP  are just two of the organizations offering programs, resources and information for those embarking on an encore career. In the short term, this transition may require additional investment of education and retraining (including working with a certified professional career coaching and strategy-creation coach). The rewards, however, can be infinite. Following your passion while giving to others can be stimulating, enlivening and offer adventures which demonstrate that, despite pleasurable memories, the best is still yet to come.

When musicians are called by an audience to perform an encore, a demand for more, it is surely a sign of success. Whether you choose an encore career out of need or want, in honoring and utilizing your skills and knowledge you are the one whose success is to be celebrated. Bravo!!

What’s your encore career story?  Please share your experience below.

Ageism can involve assumptions about, or preferential or discriminatory treatment of, someone based solely on their age. Although the word can apply to people of all ages, the negative stereotypes of aging speak to a sense of deterioration or impairment and, though not based in truth, often become part of our sub- or unconscious and accepted as fact. This kind of dismissiveness of anyone is unfortunate for everyone.

Some ageist attitudes include “jokes” or comments mocking those “over the hill” or asserting it’s impossible to find love or have an active sex life over 40. Or the phrase “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks,” despite there being centenarians who are learning computers or taking up a new language. Has a doctor ever brushed off your query about a medical issue with the attitude that it’s just part of growing older and, “well, you aren’t 20 anymore…”? Or told you, as a 40+ woman, that you should have a hysterectomy to remedy a problem without asking if you wanted any more (or any) children? Do you know anyone over 40 who was passed over for a job or promotion despite being the most qualified candidate? Certainly, some people will be more capable than others. But this is true no matter what a person’s age. If you take 20, or 100,000 people, whether they are 18 or 90, or any other age, each is an individual and will have unique needs and challenges which should be considered accordingly.

Though ageism happens on many levels, all too often when we hear about such discrimination it regards the workplace. Age-based professional bias still happens – a lot — despite the fact that there are federal and state laws meant to prohibit such discrimination. In 2014 alone, there were over 20,000 charges filed under The Age Discrimination in Employment Act (ADEA, eeoc.gov/eeoc/statistics/enforcement/adea.cfm). The ADEA is a federal law created in 1967. It protects individuals ages 40 and older, making it unlawful, for example, for an employer “to fail or refuse to hire or to discharge any individual or otherwise discriminate against any individual with respect to his compensation, terms, conditions, or privileges of employment, because of such individual’s age.” (www.eeoc.gov/laws/statutes/adea.cfm; More workplace fairness information can be found on sites like www.workplacefairness.org).

In a Forbes.com article, “The Ugly Truth About Age Discrimination,”  Liz Ryan discusses how being older and having more experiential wisdom can work in your favor. She provides this tip regarding job interview preparation; “Here’s the flip side of the age-discrimination challenge: if you know what business pain you solve and can talk to hiring managers about that pain, they can’t afford to care how old you are.” Ryan further explains that “Job-seekers who use their interview air time to ask questions about the processes, the obstacles in a hiring manager’s way and the thorny problems they’ve seen before in similar situations vault themselves to a higher level of conversation than the ones who don’t.”

For those of you who know you have much to contribute, yet no longer want to work for another boss, the statistics are in your favor. In fact, as I talk about in my #1 Amazon best seller book, The Ageless Way, the 40+ market is perfect for a new encore entrepreneurial start-up, the opportunity to change ageism into Age-Friendly while making a profit. Rather than staying in repressive, stultifying positions with a silver ceiling looming, more and more workers (particularly women who have endured long-standing conflated ageism AND sexism) are standing in their own shoes and starting their own businesses, often as solopreneurs.

Regardless of where we are in our professional lives and whether we work for someone else, are our own boss, or do not currently work, we can all play a role in pushing the edge of the envelope. We can all work toward exposing and eradicating embedded fundamental ageism and make positive change happen by turning the aging paradigm inside out.

Those of you familiar with my work will recognize my clarion call to unite and create a new story of our AGE. Your story about who you are in the world can determine your choices and whether your journey will lead to action or inaction, stagnancy or movement toward greater fulfillment. And there’s no need to agonize over what that means or make the simple more difficult. If you trust in life’s dynamic process, it will all continue to unfold as you age, and learn, and keep refining that story.

As Julie Andrews sang in The Sound of Music, “Let’s start at the very beginning — A very good place to start…” Words will always be at the root of your story, whether right now or in the future. Starting today, pay close attention to the words you use to describe yourself and others, consciously changing them, if needed. For example, whether thinking about shifting something in your professional or personal life, just replace the cultural stereotype of “It’s too late for you. You’re not credible unless you are young and beguiling!” by confirming your personal awareness that “My experience, my talents and intelligence, and my unique perspective, make the timing perfect for me to act now. I know how to focus on what really matters. All great visionaries have wrinkles.” Hopefully, though this will be only the first step of many, taking it will ensure that the next step will be that much easier.

What ageism have you experienced or witnessed in life? Was it ignored or addressed? Please share your stories in the comments below.

You may know that you want to start a business, for example, but you’re unsure of what kind of business exactly. You may only vaguely know that you want to do something purposeful, but you aren’t sure if this means volunteering or work or some combination, or what exactly you would be doing.

If you have not yet decided on what you want to be when you grow up :), consider the opportunities inherent in our most precious resource—time.

For all the time-saving technology we gain each year, we somehow seem to have less and less time available to us. Busy working parents don’t have as much time to volunteer in schools or spend as much time with their children as they’d like. Even kids don’t have as much time for free play with all their activities, sports, and school-related commitments. In an increasingly urban society, some kids have the time for free play but no safe spaces to do so, and their parents don’t have time to take them to safe spaces.

Many areas of traditional volunteer work, such as visiting with the sick and infirm, feeding the homeless, helping care for animals in shelters, and so forth, are lacking in volunteers because people simply do not have the time.

One answer, of course, is to simply step up and be a volunteer. But consider looking at this from a different perspective. How can you or your business save people time in ways that specifically allow them to have more meaningful time? With their children? Their parents? Volunteering themselves?

If you run (or plan to run) a business with employees, this could be a part of how you set up your workforce, using job sharing, flexible hours, work-at-home days, and so forth to enable your employees to balance their lives. Or your business could be the meaningful work that you (with or without employees) want the time to do.

If you are still with a company, planning your own eventual exit, now is the time to research and develop alternate scenarios that could serve you, your colleagues, and the business, such as a consultant relationship or part-time substitute situation that enables everyone to take Meaning Days along with the traditional vacation time and sick time.

Any business that brings extended families and communities together to help each other out and save time is bound to hit a ready market. What if busy parents only worried about cooking dinner once or twice a week? How about a service that brings young kids to meet with parents over lunch near or at their work?

How about a program for companies to buy into that sends groups of employees to volunteer with their families in the name of the company?

The possibilities are endless—as are the potential profits—when you consider what is truly meaningful to you and to others. Contrary to the trope about the later years of life, time really is on our side.

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I often say that most of us have the potential to do 95 percent of our best work in the last 5 percent of our lives. As we age, we become well poised to offer a range of perspectives and skills, which can only come with time and experience. This is true throughout our lives starting from when we are babies learning how to walk and speak. Our middle and later years can be a time in which many of us have raised families, had some success in our work (and perhaps reached the silver ceiling…), and may wish to pursue old (or new) dreams if we have the ability, opportunity, time and financial security.

A perfect example of someone who has learned from experience and is using her personal history and decades-long patience to find opportunity, satisfaction, and meaning is 91-year-old Barbara Beskind. Beskind was the focus of a Today Money piece by Scott Stump (February 25, 2015, Today.com), the title of which tidily sums up her story: ‘Age is not a barrier’: Tech designer, 91, lands her dream job in Silicon Valley. 

Beskind’s inventiveness began “out of necessity” during the Great Depression in the 1920’s. As she tells it, “I wanted to make a hobby horse, and I made it out of old tires. I learned a lot about gravity because I fell off so many times.” Despite having decided by 10 years old that she wanted to be an inventor, a high school counselor told her that females weren’t accepted at engineering school. She, therefore, pursued other avenues and hobbies until two years ago, at 89, she had an opportunity to follow her original dream. Beskind applied and was hired for a one-day-a-week job testing and designing aging-related products at the Silicon Valley global design firm, IDEO, where she still works today.

While praising the welcoming inter-generational culture and atmosphere at the company, in the Today story Beskind also shared her perspective about hiring someone from her generation for that position. Suggesting that many younger designers “…can’t put themselves in the shoes of the elderly” and, therefore, often design for fashion rather than functionality, she shared her feeling that “… elderly people bring experience that you can’t teach.” 

The idea of pursuing one’s passion and meaning in an “encore career,” a career after retirement, is becoming increasingly popular as we live longer and have more opportunities. Whether following through on an old dream or creating a new one, if situations permit, many of us find our satisfaction in such pursuits.

My own experience involved shifting careers in midlife (in what I have since termed my second “midlife reclamation”) from a successful corporate career to that of an educational GeroFuturist with my own consulting, coaching and publishing business. Was it easy? Not at all! Transition rarely is. Experiencing somewhat of a crisis of the Soul, I agonized while reviewing who I was and wanted to be, what was most important to me and how I could find meaning, significance and fulfillment while also giving back and making a difference for others. These are often common hallmarks for anyone pursuing their heartfelt passion and/or looking to have an encore career, whether by choice or even by necessity.

Career changes, whether they follow retirement or not, may involve some unexpected shifts, detours or delays. For those of us who are ready, Radical Reinvention is in order. Sometimes, when we consciously choose to pursue a process of breaking away from what was to what can be, we will traverse what I have long called The Canyon of the Soul. In this trek you will transform based on the best of you, as well as reclaiming the core of what really matters to you. As I mentioned in my February 11, 2014 blog, False Alarm: Reinvention is Boomer Friendly (www.karensands.com/false-alarm-reinvention-is-boomer-friendly), “Now is the last chance we get to embrace the gift of turning crisis into opportunities.”

Yes, you often have to toss out old definitions of yourself and of success, as well as aspects of your life that do not really matter, that are merely clutter. You have to remove the tangential plot lines, the side stories that distract from the main plot, and sometimes you have to even cut characters who are dragging the story down. Radical Reinvention is a purification process, getting down to your essence, to your Signature Greatness DNA, and to your core values. At the same time, you don’t have to toss the gold with the dross, so it is key to know yourself and have a clear vision.

Eight decades after dreaming of becoming an inventor, Barbara Beskind chose to make her vision a reality. Her story exemplifies that dreams can be achieved at any age. I imagine (and hope) that as we live longer, stories like this will become commonplace.

 Do you have an old dream you are pursuing? What advice do you have for others wanting to do the same?

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In a piece on Forbes, Jason Nazar speculates on the future of business and entrepreneurship. I agree with many of his points, but I think his biases color his judgment on some points, particularly regarding age.

His fourth point reveals how ingrained ageism is in our society, to the point where stereotypes linger despite evidence to the contrary. He says:

“Youth Has the Advantage – When you first start working, your opportunity cost is the lowest and your upside potential is the highest it will ever be.  Age brings more experience, but it also brings more responsibility and more severe consequences when things don’t work out. Young entrepreneurs generally have a) more energy b) more time c) more optimism/naiveté d) higher risk tolerance.  We’ll continue to see a much larger percent of successful entrepreneurs in their early twenties and teens.”

I agree, of course, that age brings more experience and generally more responsibility (although one can see how individual factors, such as having dependents, can shift this quite quickly). More severe consequences when things don’t work out could certainly apply if we’re talking about a careerist out of a job. Those in midlife and beyond tend to be unemployed for far longer.

But in terms of entrepreneurs and other small business owners, I would say that the opposite is arguably true. With experience and time in this life comes a wider network and often more resources for rebounding and weathering the storm. A strong reputation built up over the years is more likely to be given second chances and the benefit of the doubt than one that is just being formed.

But perhaps these are not the consequences to which he is referring. Specifics here, and citations, would be helpful.

The main issue in this paragraph, however, is the list of qualities youth supposedly have more of, some of which are likely to be the opposite of the truth, such as having more time. As with anything, individuals vary widely, but in general, especially as kids leave home, those in midlife and beyond tend to gain more time than they’ve ever had available in their lives. This indeed can be a source of depression for people who spent their younger years defining their identity by doing.

Even the comment about more energy, which on its face has truth to it, varies widely by individual. We’re living longer, healthier lives than ever before, and many 40+ people not only have as much energy, they have learned from life experience the importance of allocating their energy wisely, focusing more on what matters most. When this dovetails with their business or career, which it should, then they arguably have the advantage over youth in the energy available for the job.

It’s interesting that he groups optimism with naiveté, as though one must be naïve to be optimistic. This is a decidedly pessimistic view about reality, and the point about optimism doesn’t hold. Studies show that happiness has more of a U shape in life, with our younger years and our older years being happier than those in the middle. So I would not say that age confers more optimism than youth, but there is no clear argument to be made for the opposite case either.

And finally, the last attribute, higher risk tolerance, goes back to the point I made earlier about severe consequences. With age comes more likelihood of having built up the resources necessary to bounce back, so those in this position have arguably a much higher risk tolerance than young people.

Also, by midlife, we often develop a savvy, hard-earned discernment between making risky choices and taking risks. Youth tends to throw caution to the wind and be impetuous because, perhaps, they feel they have so little to lose and so much time left. We need both youthful exuberance and creativity as well as calculated, experienced-based risk-taking and innovation.

Ultimately, all we have to do is look at the data to see that this advantage does not exist on average for startups. The most successful startups, according to multiple studies, such as by the Kauffman Foundation, are those started by people age 55 to 64, and this includes tech startups. Furthermore, companies are increasingly recognizing the value of their more experienced talent, as evidence in the numerous companies signing the AARP Work Reimagined Pledge.

No one can predict the future, and we all see it through our own biases, even when we try to minimize their effect. But ageism is one bias that is taken so for granted in our society that it takes a deliberate effort and constant public conversation to highlight it and dismantle it.

And dismantling ageism is crucial not only to us as individuals who are all aging but to our businesses and our economy, especially as boomers and millennials, our largest demographics, find themselves relying on each other to make the future work.

What ageism have you encountered in others or in yourself?

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It’s crucial for all industries and fields to reach out to the 50-plus demographic; some of the most savvy are doing so. Higher education is no exception. Both Professor Rosabeth Moss Kanter at Harvard and a spanking-new initiative at Stanford University are trawling for a new kind of student seeking to reinvent the next stage after midlife. Stanford openly espouses that it wants to attract proven leaders with twenty to thirty years of work experience on the hunt to reinvent their futures.
University and advanced adult education and professional development programs are the future. No doubt a proliferation of new higher education programs modeled off of the Harvard and Stanford programs will emerge over the next decades.

I’ve been known to get rather passionate when I speak about the paucity of career changers and younger generations enrolled or even interested in the field of aging. Both are leaving money on the table and growing opportunities in the dust.

I want to rant and rave that the aging field is not all about changing bedpans. Don’t get me wrong; personal care for the frail elderly and disabled is a critical task for one of the fastest growing careers today as a health care worker.

Rather, what I’m so excited about are the enormous possibilities for meaningful work in serving the maturing 40-plus market, and those succeeding generations who will soon be 40-plussers themselves. That’s why in this chapter I’m compelled to include the trend information relating to new careers in aging.

Yet we continue to read and hear from the media that Millennials have no opportunities before them, or that Boomers and Millennials will continue to fight for job positions. Give me a break! There are so many untapped career opportunities in the aging field (and it’s tangential fields) that no one needs to be out of work! That is, not if they are trained and skilled, especially those with a long career history.
Just take a look at the numbers: The United States Census Bureau and Civic Ventures project reports that by 2030, Ameri- cans age 55 and older will number 107.6 million, 31 percent of the population. Those over 65 will account for 20 percent of the total population. The Nielsen study reports that by 2017 Baby Boomers will control 70 percent of America’s disposable income. This is a market to be reckoned with, so it’s best to get on the new millennium job growth curve in the field of aging sooner rather than later. Otherwise, you may miss an incredible opportunity of these times for your career, your business, or your organization.

Please be advised that everything in the field of aging is morphing rapidly, creating an exciting plethora of emerging opportunities in a variety of specialty roles and services. Not only because of the swelling ranks of the over-50s, but because the field of aging is evolving at warp speed. It’s not just bedpans anymore.

My goal here is to make sure you stay with me and not get turned off to this meaningful, high-impact field as your possible “what’s next” or as your new marketplace to increase your market share. So I’m going to ask you to stay with me while I share an overview of the aging field’s history right up to today…and tomorrow.

As I write, there is a great deal of healthy Creative Destruction going on in the aging field. The new “older adult” demo- graphic of Leading-Edge Boomers is wreaking havoc on the longtime preferred and universally accepted disease model of aging that has long been the underpinning of the field.
I’m a rabid fan of transforming the language, symbolism, and narrative around aging. Our languaging, especially around hot-button topics, reveals what’s not being said out loud or what is still unconscious and informs how we perceive or imagine things to be. So let’s start off with the languaging, including commonly accepted definitions and how they are integrally entwined with the history of the aging field.

• Download a FREE mini-book, “The Origins of the New HERstory of Our AGE“ based on The Ageless Way 
• Seeking a Firecracker Keynote 
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• Let’s Rock Your AGE, come pick my brain!
• Join me in my Facebook Group “The Ageless Way Explorers Coalition.”
• Join me in my Facebook Group “The Greatness Challenge.” 

2009 was the year disaster came my way. It started by quitting my job to salvage a marriage of 19 years. By midyear I divorced, left the state, and had half the assets my husband and I stringently built, never expecting to divorce. My grandfather died in July. I suffered a health issue Thanksgiving Day. My father suffered an injury that left him severely brain damaged. Let’s not forget the economic turmoil and I was 45 years old, unemployed, and in a new state (geographical as well as mental mindset).

It was tough to bounce back after the last half of 2009. While I did everything right on the outside to deal with the loss, inside was where the storm raged.

For 3 years.
During those years, I battled what I thought was the biggest obstacle to my success: introversion. I attended up to 5 networking events per week, within a 150 mile radius to build awareness for my business.

Growth occurred externally, but internally, I continued to grieve all I lost in 2009. While I blamed myself for much of the sorrow, I was also guilty of waiting for things to improve on their own.
It wasn’t until my mother, still grieving the loss of her husband (who was in a semi-vegetative state) said, “Nothing every goes right for our little family.”
“That’s not true!” I insisted. When she asked me to prove it, however, I couldn’t. We had been so locked in our negative mindset that growth and peace continued to evade us. The dark clouds still hovered and I was appalled by my negativity. I could have done something to end the storm.

Blowing the Clouds Away

It started with a smile. A soul-deep smile that radiated throughout the body. A smile that would attract people rather than keep them at a distance.
Next, I sought positivity in the past tragedies and applied it to the growth and opportunity in the present. With these tools, smiling became easier and I didn’t feel so mentally weighed down.

Glimpses of Light

The Universe observed my activity. It wasn’t going to immediately give me a thumbs-up and lay out a shiny red carpet in front of me. Nope. It tested me. A new lead backed out at the last minute. A client wasn’t pleased with my services. I got bronchitis. Twice. My laptop died. I was tempted to slip back into the storm, but moved forward instead.
Then tiny things happened. I slept better. Clients sent referrals. Migraines diminished. My blog took on new life as I focused on entrepreneurship and life after 50.
My rebrand progressed until Dad died November 2015. There were a few related setbacks but they didn’t hold me for long.
Until June 2017. I lost my two largest clients due to budget cuts and suddenly had no money coming in. This was a huge trial for me, but I kept going.

The Results of a Positive Mindset

The gloom faded quickly.
The storm didn’t infect other aspects of life.
Opportunities were easier to identify.
Additionally, I could dedicate myself fully to my rebrand without other projects competing for my time and attention.
Armed with these super powers, I got back to business with fire and determination. In under 2 months I got published in 6 online publications and was ASKED to become associate editor for Boomalally magazine.
Lessons learned:
Blow the clouds away.
Believe in yourself.
Trust yourself.
Test your limits and push past them.
Take risks.
Ignore the naysayers
Abandon the self-pity. It only gives others the opportunity to race past you.
Don’t waste another minute. Too much has already been wasted.
Make every moment count.
Furthermore, SMILE!
Recently, my mother sent a text message saying she’s having a burst of happiness. When I encouraged her to have more, she said, “I’m not normally a positive person, so I’m sure you have something to do with it.”
That certainly made me smile.
Are you ready to smile again? You’ll quickly discover that a positive mindset is contagious.
Kristen Edens
Managing Midlife

Kristen Edens is a content and brand development specialist for business. She is the founder of the Managing Midlife blog and covers topics of finance, second acts, and caregiving for the Sandwich Generation. Her writing has been featured at Business.com, Booming Encore, Small Business Monthly, St. Louis Women’s Journal, Missouri SourceLink, Better After 50, and Thrive Global. Her latest adventure is becoming the associate editor and oracle of inspiration for Boomalally, a magazine dedicated to those celebrating a life well lived after 50.

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Leading GeroFuturist best-selling author, firecracker speaker, game changer, and thought leader on the Longevity Economy, 40+ market, the business of aging, and ageless aging. A world-class trusted advisor, Master Certified Coach and expert authority, Karen boldly advocates for the new story of our age.  Karen guides go-getter entrepreneurs, trailblazers, and visionary leaders to their niche in the global business of aging while evolving their role in response to this new narrative. Karen is an in-demand speaker known for dynamic presentations and a remarkable gift for captivating any audience!

Contact Information: http://www.karensands.com/ | 203-266-1100 | Karen@KarenSands.com| https://www.linkedin.com/in/karensands/

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The Ageless Way
The Ageless Way – A Companion Journal/Workbook
The Greatness Challenge
Gray is the New Green
Visionaries Have Wrinkles
Visionaries Have Wrinkles Reflections Journal
Visionaries Have Wrinkles Reflections Card Deck
Ageless Reinvention (Releasing 2018-2019)
Mastering Reinvention for Midlife & Beyond – (Re-releasing 2018-2019)

Articles about the higher rate of divorce among people post-50 seem to appear with some regularity. For example, I came across another one, “Gray divorces rising as more baby boomers opt to end marriages,” with nothing particularly surprising in it, of course. (I doubt it was intended to be a shocking story.)

Most of the reasons for divorce among Boomers are similar to those of people divorcing at any age, such as growing apart or one person falling in love—or just in bed—with someone else. For Boomers, additional factors come into play:

• After the kids leave home or after one or both persons are home more often, couples often see their relationship in a new light, one that can reveal weaknesses or complete disintegration.
• Women are more financially independent than in the past, so they are not tied to a marriage for security.
• Boomers in general value independence and personal development, so it makes sense to many that they shouldn’t stay married if they are unhappy.
• The combination of facing mortality as well as facing a longer, healthier life ahead compared with past generations, people realize they don’t want to spend the time they have left with each other.

One quote in the article stood out to me in particular, from a family lawyer, Lynne Gold-Bikin, who noted that a third person is often the catalyst for someone to end a relationship. “They may need that push to get them out, what I call the springer. You need somebody to spring you from the marriage.”

For some, this “springer” was the third person in an affair, something that usually occurs long after the marriage has started to fall apart. Giving ourselves permission to break commitments made in good faith before reaching this point could save a lot of pain and heartache.

If more couples could end an unhappy marriage by reaching loving closure, before reaching the point of finding someone else, both could move on without carrying the painful baggage with them. The would-be cheater avoids the spiral of collusion and betrayal. The person who would be cheated on is saved the hurt and deceit. Both avoid falling into the martyred victim role, giving up power over their life choices by blaming the other (for cheating, for driving the other away, etc.). This is all easier said than done, of course!

Another type of “springer” is a more positive, encouraging influence. This idea of being sprung from a trap, and needing a third person to help you do so, even if you know you are trapped before that person comes along, is a recurring theme in life post-50 that goes beyond relationships for many.

• Feeling trapped in a job you no longer or never did love, just putting in your time until you can retire.
• Feeling trapped by the very idea of retirement when you want to keep working, leading, contributing, making a difference.
• The Sandwich Generation feeling trapped by the needs of their kids and their parents, wondering when they’ll have time to pursue their own visions.
• Feeling trapped in our bodies, which no longer look or work quite as they used to, and the fear of these changes accelerating down the road.

This list could go on and on, as we all know, but what I am getting at is this idea that sometimes we need another person to spring us. How many of us have knowingly stayed trapped because we have deer-in-the-headlights syndrome or we simply do not know which steps to take next?

A third party (or several people) can be just the catalyst, support, and guidance we need, depending on the situation. For example:

• A mentor or coach to guide us to redefining our careers or retirement
• A caretaker with new ideas or simply hands-on support for Sandwich situations
• A women’s group to share our personal, visceral experiences as well as solutions for the trapped feeling (if not solutions for some of the changes in our bodies, particularly those related to health)

I do not think we should wait around for this person to find us, however. If you know you are trapped, start reaching out. Even if you do not feel trapped, reaching out may open doors you didn’t even know existed and could provide the support and guidance you could need down the road.

In the midst of a situation that seems to be all about breaking away and dividing, we can take away a valuable lesson about coming together by reaching out—and up.

In what areas of your life and work could you use a catalyst to spur you toward change?

Amazon #1 Best Seller Author of 11 books including The Ageless Way, Gray is the New Green, Visionaries Have Wrinkles, The Greatness Challenge and more.