Everyone wants long term success. But it is elusive for most.

Long term success is dependent on knowing where you are now and where you are headed. Then closing the gap. Frequently. Continuously.  Whether it’s your business, your career or your life at home., it’s easy to get off track, lose touch or get buried under. Without a true sense of where you are in the moment, it is impossible to realize your dreams or be a leader in your field.

Re-calibrate your profound knowledge

The only way we can take 100% responsibility for sustaining our success is to keep re-calibrating-in every aspect of our lives and organizations.

Key to successful recalibration is to acquire what my dear departed mentor, Dr. W. Edwards Deming, coined as Profound Knowledge. This umbrella phrase emphasizes understanding change and how to measure it, being aware of emerging trends and shifts, and learning how to apply this knowledge to leading and sustaining long term success.

Bottom line: If we don’t acquire Profound Knowledge we cannot know how to prepare for and leverage coming change, thus how to sustain our success long term.

Understanding change means understanding shifts in our personal world as well as tracking trends that capsize us, overtake us, or cause us to flounder.

Learning the Hard Way

Unfortunately one of my Gen X male clients learned this the hard way. A rising star in his field and recently married, he was planning far a great future for his kids, tons of time for fun and all the trappings of success. As if out of the blue, the rug got pulled out from under him. His “Happy Homemaker” wife fled, saying I’m out of here!

Somewhere along the way there was a breakdown or perhaps many small fissures below the surface. Had they been recalibrating an checking in with each other, communicating the truth of what was so for each of them…perhaps they could have saved their marriage…or at least ended it with love, grace, and forgiveness.

Even in the most secure relationships, unexpected change happens to ruffle our plans. A recently returned to work mother of teenage kids reported that her new career is now going gangbusters and she no longer worries about the empty-nest . But, the new ripple in her life is that her once very successful husband, in his late 40’s, now faces an unknown future. Surprised by the shifts in his industry, “suddenly” he and his business partner are facing the probability of closing their doors. What once appeared to be the sure path to their dreams, is no crumbling beneath them.

Change is inevitable. If you can learn what Profound Knowledge is and apply it you can avoid these same pitfalls and NOT LEARN THE HARD WAY!

What steps are you going to take to future cast your long term success?

We expect retirement to bring various freedoms, like the financial freedom to do everything you had to put aside raising children and working all those years. But, do our expectations always paint a clear picture of reality?

Depending on your freedom of time and financial planning, retiring can be an enjoyable and fulfilling time of your life, but for many people it is filled with financial uncertainty along with feeling purposeless and lost.

What are the Pros to Retiring?

As mentioned above, retiring can be a wonderful time in your life. You need to make sure that you plan for years in advance. Neglecting your long-term financial status could leave you in a tough spot when it comes time to retire.

If you’re married, this can be a great opportunity to grow with your spouse. Being able to reconnect with your spouse and invest in your relationship in a way that was not always possible when you were busy working.

Retirement can also be a time to develop a sense of purpose. You can invest time in things you had long wanted to. Whether that is taking up a new hobby, writing that book you always wanted to write, or learning a new skill. For many people retiring can be a new chapter in life to learn and explore yourself.

What are the Cons of Retiring?

For some, retirement can be filled with grief and lack of purpose. Many adults feel retirement marks the beginning of old age and redundancy. This can lead to feelings of stagnation and depression.

You are susceptible to loss of drive and motivation for productivity. This lack of productivity can lead to boredom or restlessness. People who are used to having a fast-paced job and lifestyle can feel frustrated at the slow pace of retirement, making it difficult to relax.

Dealing with a Lack of Purpose During Retirement

It can be tough to navigate life once retirement comes around. You may start feeling uneasy and don’t know what to do with yourself. There are many options that can help people figure out what to do with their retirement.

This could mean joining a painting class or going to a book club. It is important to stay active and to engage your brain by doing things that require you to be creative and problem solve.

Some options for staying active could include tennis, yoga, swimming, or daily walks. If you’re prone to restlessness and need to relax, meditation is an excellent option that also engaging your brain.

Retirement is an adjustment, but if viewed with the right attitude it can be a great chapter in your life. You may even find yourself being more productive than when you were working full time.

A Guest Post by Alexis Schaffer

Alexis Schaffer is a former ballet instructor and aspiring nurse. In her free time she teaches yoga and writes for various online publications. She’s also the proud dog mom of a beagle named Dobby.

I have to admit it. I am one who likes the familiarity of my comfort zone. After all, its called a “comfort zone” for a reason – it’s comfortable there. However, it can also be a deceptive trap that turns “living” into mere “existence.”

Comfort zones are full of routine; you know – the same-old, same-old. Comfort zones develop slowly – almost imperceptibly. Soon, the air in the comfort zone gets stale, the “flow” of life begins to stagnate, and personal growth comes to a gradual halt. In some cases, personal growth can even shift into reverse.

So, if you’re stuck in a comfort zone, ignore that inner voice that vibrates within every fiber of your being saying, “Stop! Danger beyond this point!” Try these eight “steps” to start really living and moving forward again:

1.  Step inward. Reconnect with your spiritual side of life in whatever way you find fulfilling. Go back to your place of worship if you’ve been away for a while. Learn how to meditate and practice it every day whether that be before you start your day or at its end. Your spiritual life is there waiting to be developed into a spiritual muscle that will serve you and others in times of need and, of course, in times of thanksgiving.

2. Step forward. Volunteer to help your favorite charity or cause. There are many nonprofit organizations that rely heavily on volunteer support to provide badly needed services. Find that new job you dream of and quit the one you hate. Move from survival to significance.

3. Step more. Get physical and feel stronger. Make it a point to get that 30 minutes of exercise a day, five days a week – even if it’s in 10-minute increments. Move! Feel your body come alive in its movement. Dance! Feel the grace and exquisite motion that your body is capable of. Stretch like a cat and wake your body up from head to toe.

4. Step outward. “The best way to make a friend is to be a friend.” – anonymous. Be a friend! Do things together and for each other. Go places and share memories. Learn about the variety of personalities and the ones you “click” with and those you don’t. As for the ones you don’t, Abraham Lincoln said, “Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?”

5. Step outside. That’s right. Open your door and go outside. Smell the fragrances in the air. Close your eyes and listen to the sounds of nature. Fill your lungs with fresh air and use your outside voice. See the colors of nature from brilliant sunrises and sunsets to the deep purples and greens of the forest. Wonder at the nighttime sky. Awaken your senses in the world outside. It awaits just outside your door.

6. Step deeper. Listen to your feelings. Share them with a trusted friend or relative. Life has its ups and downs and having someone to share them with helps us work through the emotions that are involved. Talk to a professional if you’ve been feeling down. Emotions cannot be ignored any more than pain in your chest.

7. Step upward. Stretch that intellectual muscle by learning something new. Take a class at your local college or through community education, usually connected with the school system. Read! Find a mentor who can teach you something new.

8. Step gracefully. Let your innate creativity flow out of your calling. Paint beautiful paintings, write inspirational words, dance the dance of your life. Enjoy the talents of others. Remember healthy family traditions and values and teach them to your children. Venture into the cultures of others different from you. Enjoy their food, learn about their values and traditions. Appreciate the diversity in life and celebrate it in all its glory.

If you try any of these eight steps to break out of your comfort zone, you are awakening the seven dimensions of wellness in your life and becoming refined by age. Go on. Get out of that puddle of a comfort zone and into the fast flowing river of life and wellness.

Reprinted with permission from refinedbyage.com

A Guest Post by Kathy Sporre

I have worked in the aging field for over 28 years, serving on initiatives at the national and international level. I want to help people become Refined by Age by encouraging them to age intentionally through developing the Seven Dimensions of Wellness in their lives: spiritual, emotional, physical, intellectual, social/cultural, environmental, vocational. I also want to help people become aware of age discrimination – a form of discrimination that is entrenched in society.

Finding the Best Long-term Care for an Aging or Disabled Loved One

By Dawn Waddell Elledge RN, CCM Board Certified Aging Life Care Professional, Owner @ Elledge Geriatric Care Management

Whether or not you have thought about long term care for an aging or disabled loved one, the reality is that human life expectancy has increased steadily over the past few decades. The number of people living past 70 has dramatically increased, and because of higher standards of living, by the year 2040 the percentage of nursing home residents will jump from 50% to 130%. In the United States, more than 70% of nursing home residents are 75 years of age or older. 92% of those are Caucasian, 6% are African-American, 1% are Spanish, and the remainder are Asian, Hispanic mix or of other Native American descent. Another important contributing factor to the ever increasing need for long term care is the decline of the extended family in our culture. American households consists mainly of what sociologists refer to as the “nuclear family.” This is where the home is downsized to a single unit family replacing the former agricultural and extended family group.

Because we live in a very mobile society, more families are moving miles apart as the children become adults. Siblings are far removed from one another, and parents are very likely to have to care for themselves when they grow older.

The bottom line is that long-term care issues are here to stay. Also very important is the awareness that long-term care insurance premiums are usually less if you buy them when you are younger; this is not a preparation that should be postponed until one is nearing the possibility of needing long-term care facility placement.

Here’s a rundown of some of the types of long-term care settings most commonly found in communities throughout the United States today…

Adult Daycare alternative

Accessory Dwelling Units alternative

Subsidized Senior Housing

Board and Care Homes

Assisted Living Facilities

Continuing Retirement Communities

Certified (Medicare) Home Health Care option to facility based alternative

Hospice Care alternative

Respite Care alternative

Home and Community-Based Waiver Programs for the Medicaid & V.A. Eligible

Programs of All-inclusive Care for the Elderly who are Medicare/Medicaid

Nursing Homes (custodial-non-skilled-non-Medicare-long-term care)

Retirement Centers/Apartments

Multi-level of Care Complexes

Personal residential or facility based private pay sitter

For senior citizens and their loved ones there is a vast number of resources within every community, these are just a few examples:

Local Community Senior Citizens Centers for Supportive Services

Transportation Programs

Non-Medical Care Agencies

Certified Home Health Care Agencies

Geriatric Care Management (Aging Life Care Professional)

State Ombudsman

State Dept. of Health

Council on Aging

Veterans Services

Mental Health

Dementia & Aging Care-Giver Support Groups

Admin. On Aging at www.aoa.gov (1-202-619-0724)

Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services at www.medicare.gov

ELDERCARE LOCATOR www.eldercare.gov

Long-Term Care Ombudsman (1-202-332-2275 FOR MORE INFO)

State Health Insurance counseling & Assist. Through St. Dept. of Health

Area Agencies on Aging at www.eldercare.gov

Aging & Disability Resource Center at www.adrc-tae.org

For more information on dementia care go to Alz.org or contact Vanderbilt Memory and Alzheimer’s Cntr.

__________________________________________________________________

Dawn Waddell Elledge RN, CCM Board Certified Aging Life Care Professional, Owner @ Elledge Geriatric Care Management

I’m currently transitioning from professional board certified geriatric care management to becoming a hospice nurse manager in the home health sector. I write books that outline how “it will dawn on ya, life’s a journey….” Life has certainly been an interesting journey for me as a nurse person who has keen insights on living, aging and accepting the natural process of it all, like you mean it. Intentional living is what the journey is all about!!

Sacramento, Ca. – I love to remember the tiger lilies that grew in my granny’s Oklahoma red dirt. They seemed magical with their bright orange color and their black speckled petals. Every time I see one I’m reminded of the Oklahoma summers I spent playing with cousins and eating my granny’s wonderful cooking.  The ones I grow must be missing the red dirt of Oklahoma because they’re not as prolific in my Sacramento Valley dirt but they still remind me of my roots and my sweet granny.

Living longer and better requires a lot of attention to exercise and brain fitness. We all need exercise, fresh air and sunshine to maintain good health. Our brains also need to be exercised and experts agree that reminiscing can elevate our moods and flex our brains in many positive ways. One way to kill two birds with one stone is to grow a memory garden.

Our ability to smell is the strongest facilitator of remembering. Fragrant plants can take us back to our childhood or recall a day in the garden with a loved one. I especially like to grow the plants that have been given to me by family and friends. Roses are perhaps the most fragrant and are easy to share with others. Cuttings taken in winter can be rooted and gifted for summertime blooms.

Who doesn’t have a planting of Hens and Chicks that someone gave us? My garden is filled with plants and flowers that my mother has given me. Most of them she dug up from her garden and that makes them more special to me.

My Granddaddy loved crepe myrtles. They grew all over the 160 acres where my father grew up. Their ruffled and papery blooms gave him so much pleasure as mine do for me. They also remind me of my grandparents’ old farmhouse and how excited I got as a child when we were close enough to see the windmill turning in the field. I can just see my granddad go out past the woods to find Goldie, my father’s buckskin mare. Crepe myrtles are planted at the head of my granddaddy’s grave. I took my own children back to the homestead while they were still little. The farmhouse is gone, the windmill is broke down and laying in the field, but crepe myrtles still grow next to where the front porch once stood.

My daughter hated gardening when she was a child. She would promise to clean the whole house if I just wouldn’t ask her to lend a hand in the dirt. Regardless of her complaining, I made her learn all the names of the flowers we grew. She was a quick learner and managed to only spend a short time in the flower beds. But one year I found a way to lure her into the garden. I planted a sunflower house with six different varieties of sunflowers and morning glories that climbed up the giant stalks. Every day she would go out to see the house’s progress. When it grew big enough, she would go inside and sit a while dreaming. She’s now a mother herself and now enjoys planting flowers and vegetables with her two sons. I try to grow sunflowers every year, mostly to remember the summer of that Tara took to gardening because of a sunflower house.

Gardening can be so beneficial for getting you in shape, exposing you to fresh air and it can be a social connector also. Whether you love to garden or just love someone who does, it gives you an opportunity to connect. Just ask that gardening friend or family member to show you their garden. Take them a small plant and you’ll be remembered for years to come. Chances are that you’ll come home with a memory plant of your own.

Karen Everett Watson is a certified gerontologist who lives in the Sacramento Valley just a mile from her parents who give her a constant flow of topics on aging. She enjoys her three children, 10 grandchildren, her chickens and two acre homestead.

Over the course of 30 years, a career can teach you a lot about yourself and the kind of person you are. You will likely develop some opinions about the type of businessperson you are as well. I have had the chance to try many different things with many levels of success and failure on the curve. I have no regrets.

Quit: I walked out of a small software company. Why? The guy who ran sales was one of those jump-on-the-desk-and-tell-you-you’re-stupid kinds of leaders. He would threaten to fire you daily. I refused to go through the abuse.

• Pros – It was over, and I could focus on something new. I felt good being away from all the negative energy and I clearly wasn’t going to learn anything I wanted to emulate. I learned many things “not” to do.

• Cons – Loss of income, especially as my wife was pregnant. I selfishly created stress for those around me. Some feared I might be labeled a “quitter,” though that never really bothered me. Labels suck.

Fired: A large brokerage firm fired me. Why? I refused to sell proprietary products to my clients, so my production fell, and they showed me the door.

• Pros – Few people who get fired are surprised, so there is some element of relief that comes with the experience being over. I could sleep again. I had checked off one more thing I wanted to try, it didn’t work, so I was one step closer to my career ambition.

• Cons – Loss of income, as my wife was pregnant again. Being on the 72nd floor of the former World Trade Center was, bar none, the most dynamic environment in which I have ever worked. A couple of hundred brokers and traders who were smart, witty and equally adept, whether male or female, at telling the best jokes on the planet. I still miss them, 23 years later.

Retired: After we (the executive team I was part of) had negotiated the sale of the software company we managed, I walked away from a large retention bonus and took a shot at retirement. Why? I worked every day for eight years and missed every significant milestone important to my kids and our family.

• Pros – Time, free time to do whatever I wanted. I got to spend time with my beautiful and wonderful sister before she died. I learned how to go to the supermarket, and I enjoyed it. I cooked a lot.

• Cons – I had too much free time. I had no plan, no bucket list. I had all this time and nothing to do. I don’t play golf and am not a boater. I stayed up late, slept even later and developed every vice a middle-aged man with a few bucks in his pocket can have.

In my quest to experience everything in my career I think I have just about closed the book, but there is a lesson learned here. With all I have experienced I still have a thirst to learn and try new things. I think I am improving my business skills and still have career-related goals that I would like to achieve.

So I have quit, been fired and retired and just don’t recommend any of them… at least not for me. There are still many mountains to climb.

My best, Chris

About the author: Christian J. Farber and wife Susan live in Tinton Falls, NJ. Their home is near the shore where they spend a lot of time at the beach with their three boys. Chris is a featured and contributing author on many social media platforms. These include The Huffington Post, and his site Farberisms. Chris has had a long career in Marketing and Sales. He is a visionary thinker on business development. Chris has a reputation for building high-performing marketing and sales teams. His unique management style focuses on allowing people to perform without pressure or interference. Chris led many successful teams and performed transformation work at State Street Bank. Further, he has had success at start-up companies like Albridge Solutions. At Albridge, Chris was an early employee and helped lead the company’s dramatic growth. Albridge, acquired by PNC Bank in 2008 for more than $300 million, is now a unit of The Bank of New York.

Courage is an internal process. It occurs when you make a conscious decision to tap into and use your inner “reservoir” of heart, which you might not have even realized you have.

Courage manifests itself when a person embarks on a journey that is in line with their “heart and spirit.” In fact, heart and spirit is the root of the word courage. Tapping into your courage enables you to stand in your true Self — your solid core. A courageous person’s leadership style exemplifies their ability to “lead self.” This is where you display your understanding of courage consciousness such as Eleanor Roosevelt and Abraham Lincoln. They acted according to their convictions despiteopposition or attractive opportunities that would betray their true nature.

Simple everyday courage can be a powerful force for positive change, and it’s available to everyone because it’s your birthright. It’s what gives you permission to finally ask for a raise, confess that you hired the wrong person or spot, and act to the first red flags.

Empowerment is a feeling, a quiet dignity and belief that every individual has value and a determination to base one’s life actions on that belief. Martin Luther King, Jr. and Mahatma Gandhi demonstrate empowerment, as does contemporary activist Shannon Galpin. Empowered individuals move societies forward. Empowerment can result when someone else bestows responsibility or faith in us. Empowerment can also be the mental outcome of a brave act. One feels empowered.

Bravery is action.It is most often thought of as an impulsive act to protect others at one’s own expense, in the face of an imminent threat or danger. It carries a sense of physical threat and is usually accompanied by adrenaline-activated feats, commonly referred to as “heroism.” Our culture tends to focus on bravery since it hovers around physical courage. Physical courage is one of many facets of courage such as spiritual courage, leadership courage or moral/ethical courage.

Global speaker Sandra Ford Walston is known as “The Courage Expert” says that she has one job: to teach people how to claim their courage. And when people engage Sandra, their lives move to their true Self. For over twenty years she has been a human potential specialist who studies courage. She is a certified coach and certified in the Enneagram and MBTI®. The author of three books, Sandra is a trailblazer in the field of feminine courage, everyday courage and non-gender courageous leadership. Sandra enjoys golf, skiing, yoga, travel, cooking, meditation, reading, and being an 11th Hour hospice volunteer.

Estate planning to achieve these goals can be complicated. The typical “all to my spouse, then equally to the children” estate distribution does not work with blended families. That is because there is always the risk that the surviving spouse will disinherit the decedent’s children and pass the assets to his/her children. In addition, the competing interests of potential beneficiaries can lead to discord resulting in an ugly and costly court battle.

It is for these reasons that it is recommended that blended families use trusts. Specifically, revocable trusts with QTIP provisions. QTIP renders the trust irrevocable upon the death of the settlor. (the person who established the trust).
When a person is getting married for the second or third time it is important to consider the implications of the new relationship, including the need for an updated estate plan and beneficiary clauses. In other words blended families need to be careful. And being diligent can prevent potential complications and keep familial harmony even in the trying times of a passing.

Do you have any experience you could share?

About the Author

Attorney Bahrawy has 39 years experience as an Estate Planning and Elder Law Attorney. He represents individuals and families in both simple sophisticated estate planning strategies. He also advises families with special needs, whether children or adult, on estate planning matters.
Attorney Bahrawy represents elders and caregivers to plan for future or, in some circumstances, an immediate need for institutional medical care. In this regard Attorney Bahrawy assists elders in applying and qualifying for Medicaid, making or adjusting estate plans such as Wills, Trusts and Advance Directives, estate administration, fiduciary litigation, Will contests, guardianship of elderly persons, and elder abuse. Attorney Bahrawy believes that that lawyers serve their clients best by planning ahead rather than solving problems after they occur.

Attorney Bahrawy is a member of the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys. He hosted and produced a television program called Your Money. Your Life – a show dedicated to educating the public on issues particularly relevant to people over age 50 such as estate planning, elder law, elder services, financial planning. Life style issues and medical care. He currently appears as a speaker on elder issues at local senior centers, social organizations and legal forums. Mr. Bahrawy has also appeared as a guest on various radio programs in Massachusetts, New Hampshire , Florida, North Carolina and Utah.

Your Next Chapter

Life is supposed to be full of milestones. Things like graduation, getting married, buying a house, a new job or the birth of a child. Every self-help book that I have read recently, asks the question- what is your next move? The audiobooks that I listen to are challenging me to step out of my comfort zone and try something new. This type of action will propel me to the next level of my career, lifestyle or whatever the new thing that I aspire to.

Do I want to sell my house and move to Dubai? Do I want to spend a week in the woods with nothing but a tent, ax and a camp stove? Heck no. I don’t think these drastic changes in my lifestyle will push me up the preverbal ladder of life.

What if there is no next chapter? What if there is no ladder of life to climb? What if you are living and breathing your next chapter at this very minute?

Stop living for the future. Stop buying into the nonsense that you need to have three years experience before you can apply for that job that you are more than qualified for. Stop telling yourself that you will finish your degree when your children are in school. Stop thinking that you can’t possibility sing in the choir because you haven’t practiced enough.

You are writing your life story in the here and now.
Your next chapter is here and now. Your next chapter is what you do and the decisions you make every day. Waiting for something big may not make you take those small daily steps that are part of your everyday story. Everyday stories add up to a full chapter. Full chapters add up to a very interesting and engaging book.

Enjoy your story in the here and now.

Your Next Chapter is Now

About the Author

Jan has been working in senior living for over 22 years. She has learned throughout her career that everyone needs encouragement. Everyone has a story and it is never too late to make a fresh start. Her blog janwieder.com is full of encouraging stories.

However, from the vibrating heart of our dissipating structures comes the promise of our true greatness: a greatness of awareness and action that will change the world. From the midst of the evolving Great Transition, we leave the Great Recession and the uplifting Obama era behind us as we enter an unknown, unchartered new cycle of populism and extreme radicalism ripping our valued democratic tenets to shreds and putting each of us on the line.  This Great Shift demands that we each unlock our potential for greatness which lives in each of us, and we are being called to make a difference. That is the premise of The Greatness Challenge, in which I offer a template for embracing and embodying our unique Signature Greatness DNA^SM to unleash our personal and collective greatness.

The Greatness Challenge is a manifesto for the growing wave of us who want to add value in all we do and who are being called to personal and collective evolution—from dentists to doctors, executives to engineers, artists to teachers and visionary leaders and futurists who are looking to redesign their lives so that every moment counts . . . for those of you who seek work that not only fills your bank accounts but your “values” bank as you yearn to do well doing good . . . for leaders who seek a pathway to visionary leadership, so the impact you have is of the greatest benefit for all.

To be one of the first to hear about The Greatness Challenge when it releases join us in the Secret Facebook Group here.